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So inspiring....Read Jamies blog on twloha's myspace....
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| Where have all my friends gone?
I just realized today that i basically have to beg my "friends" to hang out with me...
What happened?
I remember when my friends would call me to make plans, but lately every time someone calls its only because I called them first...
Why doesn't anyone want to hang out with me anymore?
I have been really depressed lately and I have been searching for the reason, and I finally figured it out today.
Living life without friends to spend time with is like taking the light out of your life...
And I'm so tired of living in darkness.
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| WWW.SAVEMIDNIGHTSUN.COM GO NOW AND SIGN THE PETITION FOR STEPHENIE TO FINISH MIDNIGHT SUN!So many of us love her and what she does, and were greatly disappointed when she made the announcement that she was putting Midnight Sun on hold indefinately. Maybe if we show her how much we love her and support her, it will raise her spirits enough to get her in the mood to write again! She definately, at least, needs to see that we support what she does. Even if the petition doesn't convince her to finish the book, at least maybe we can accomplish something by showing her how much we support her.WHOS WITH ME?! |
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| Recently I have joined the To Write Love On Her Arms street team. This organization has changed my life. I have been a victim of rape, physical abuse, emotional abuse, self harm, attempted suicide, and have had someone else attempt to kill me. When I was in the fourth grade my cousin chelsey killed her self while babysitting me. I was downstairs watching TV and she went upstairs into her room. I found her after about an hour of getting bored with the TV. I was shattered, and went to years of therapy. Since then one person close to me has died every year. Fifth grade it was my grandpa Randy. Sixth grade my uncle Kevin. Seventh my friend Crystal killed herself in her garage. Eighth my friend Kelsey was murdered by her mom. Ninth my friend Alex got in a car acciedent. Tenth my friend Tyler had a drug overdose. Eleventh my friend JT killed himself and blamed it on me, and my friend Nycholle got in a car accident where she was killed by a drunk driver along with her unborn child. Senior year my counselor was murdered by her husband. And this past year my grandfather who I was closer to than anyone in the world died of a heart attack. In high school I attempted suicide eight times, and my senior year my mom and I got in a fight that got physical and ended up with her ontop of me choking me. Had one of my friends not walked in the room I would not be alive today. It's not hard to believe with this past that I fell into a life of self injury. It started with banging my wrists on tables and chairs until they were black and blue. Then it escallated to pulling my hair out when ever I got stressed and upset, and ultimately led to cutting. my sophomore year of highschool my dad found out about my cuts and grounded me for them. So I started being more creative, cutting on the inside of my thighs or my calves. I never wore shorts anyway, so no one ever saw them. Sophomore year I also started dating this guy Josh. Things were great up until the six month point, and then one day he raped me. He continued to rape me and hit me through the course of our two year relationship. He isolated me from my friends and my family, making me believe that he was all I had, and therefore making me afraid to leave him because I was afraid that then if he was gone I would have noone. The relationship ended when he moved to another state. My friend Lauren started talking to me again and invited me to church, where I felt accepted and loved for the first time. I kept going for a couple of months when I met Richard. He has helped me so much, and without him I never would have been able to stop cutting, or to get over what Josh did to me. A couple of months ago I was struggling with cutting, and he decided that maybe we should try focusing my energy on something positive. He found countless recovery sites, but the one that has always stuck with me and the one that touched me the most was TWLOHA. Renee's story is diffrent from mine, but still similar in some ways...and she survived...with help. And the love in this story made me stop and think about the love in my life, the "Jamie" in my life (jamie is the guy who started TWLOHA)...The happy ending to this story is Richard. I love him so much, and he has shown me how important God is in my life. and how important it is to help other people, even if I haven't been through a problem like theirs...All they need is love...love fixes everything, and without love we are nothing. The bible says that God IS love...and God is a living thing...Therefore LOVE is alive...and we need to share the love with everyone, so that it will grow. Because like all living things, love can die, and we must never allow that to happen. We have to share love with everyone, showing them that there is hope, and there are ways to survive, but only with love....because without love, we are nothing.
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